ADD?

I was thinking the other day about how many different things I've done in my life. The opportunities I've had and what I've succeeded at. I also realized none of them have ever been too big of a deal to me. I was a music major in school but i didn't hang out with any fellow musicians. If somebody was like, you know..Ashley, the oboe player. They'd say, is she in SAI? Well then i don't know her. Or the fashion shows i did; i always felt awkward being the only non-fashion major and knowing absolutely none of the other designers. That didn't mean i wanted to get to know them though. I was involved with the TV station and the Radio station, but I never hung out with their crowd or went to the "crew baseball games" or banquets. I put shows on for 3 years but I didn't surround myself with only scene kids. No one respected me in the scene, and i didn't really care.
I've never wanted to kiss ass in the things i do. I didn't bow at the feet of my conducter so he could love me, I didn't show up at every local show just to keep up my popular image. I didn't attend all the meetings or events of organizations i was in. I never wanna be the person who has to try to fit in.
Sometimes I think, why couldn't I have been popular with the Hanover punk rock kids? Why didn't more music majors want to come to my parties? I've won awards for almost everyone of my accomplishments, so it's not that I'm not good. I think about real musicians, real designers, people who work to try to be a VJ for MTV, and i worry-maybe I just don't have passion about anything. I'm content with being pretty good at a lot of different things, but there's nothing in my life that strikes me as so important I'd need to immerse myself in that culture. That's why it's really difficult to decide what I want to do with the rest of my life. Or maybe i just have ADD.