My life...is apparenlty good enough for you to be reading about.

Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Between a Rock and a Hard-on

Probably my favorite "public sex" story. Okay so maybe it's my only.

Heroin Aaron and I took a trip down to Ocean Shitty for a grandious Fourth of July weekend. Starting the vacation off around midnight, we drove down to the beach and arrived around 4 or 5am. The classy people we were, we decided to sleep on a blanket on the sand. I removed my glasses and we started to get busy in the pitchblack. I looked around enjoying the sights and sounds. Near the shoreline I saw a large rock and kept looking back at it for some reason.
A few minutes later, lights started flashing down the beach so we opted to get un-naked and go to bed. I looked back over at the rock and it was gone. And then we saw a man walk right up beside us.
So after looking over at him again and again yet continuing to get in on, i'm pretty sure he thought i liked his presence. In fact, i may be on the internet somewhere.

Poisonous

One night I spent the night with my friend Cynthia in her castle-like mansion of Hanover. I threw my stuff in her brother's trunk and he drove me home. She calls me up about an hour later to tell me a pair of my underwear must have fallen out onto her driveway. It was laying right next to a bird. A dead bird. He had a piece of my underwear in his mouth.

Monday, January 29, 2007

My life

Having a hilarious sex talk with some girlfriends, Morgan remarked how rediculously shitty most of my situations have been. I should write a book to women about crap that they could be dealing with but most don't have my bad luck. So, if i can actually keep up, I thought why not mention a crazy story of my life everyday.

I'd like to start with one of my most embarassing, or perhaps dissapointing, experiences as a young, 23-year-old woman. I have come across 8 different cases of erectile disfunction. Yes-8. The first-nerves, the second-drugs and drinks, the third could have possibly been gay or was simply grossed out at my woman parts, next was more nerves, the fifth actually had a health problem, one after that was supposedly too drunk, the seventh didn't even have a reason for it not working, and the latest one was apparenlty never in the mood.
I've thought about blaming myself for this issue-maybe it's my hygiene, maybe it's the cosmetic look. Then i remembered i have been complimented down there before, so it can't be the working order of things. I simply chalk it up to an unfortunate curse that has been set upon me. Maybe it will ago as I get older-but i sincerely doubt that. So for other women out there who experience this-we can't feel bad, we can't exactly blame them, but we can leave a little upset and still a little horny.

Monday, January 22, 2007

I hate working, it's so stupid. I'd much rather not have to do it.

After all my boring jobs, getting fired, quitting, hating my life waking up early, working for shitty bosses that never gave a crap about me-I concluded there's only about 3 jobs that I've ever totally liked doing. Fashion designer, show promoter, and musician. It took me until now to realize it isn't that i was made out to be famous with Le Rat or that school would help me along my music business career path-I believe it was because I could be my own boss. I ran things my own way, made the amount of money i put the effort into, and i never felt like i was working. Even my brother said it's a great idea if i could just own by own business. Now i know why people would love to have their own bar, salon, or car shop.

I've even decided to start a stab at a new career (no surprise as i have about 9 different 10-99's coming to me this year). I'm doing sales! It's no base salary, which hopefully isn't as bad as a fear-but a lot of potential for mega bucks! I love rolling up to my bosses benz, bmws, and the lamboraghini (i have no idea how that's spelled). If i don't get many sales, i haven't worked hard enough; when i do sell and make lots-it makes me feel like i've definitely succeeded. This is a job where i'm almost feeling like my own boss and i'm getting good sales advice on the side too.

Wish me luck-because you know you would not mind coming to visit and riding around in a new corvette.

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Networking

Last night I went to an "industry party" at the Foundation Room (this sounds so vegas) to get to know more people in my Supernova venture. I printed out ghetto business cards in about 10 minutes at Kinko's and was on my way. I met a guitar singer/songwriter that turned down a composition major at Julliard. He actually knows what an oboe is and I thought he'd be someone good to know if I get my classical wedding music stuff started. I also met a rapper -eewalk i believe was his name. I don't know how well that would pan out for an indie rock concert, but I do love some independent rappers. And I met some girls that go around promoting for clubs and might be able to hook me up if i call them. It was fun, it felt good to be doing something for my job (and getting free drinks during the time). But now...I'm off to another job interview.